Senate Shenanigans

By: Jordan Minnick

The senate messing around? Nooo (wink, wink). The senate is always on their best behavior. So don’t believe accusations of unprofessional conduct. For instance, the instigation of brutal page dance-offs, where pages were lured into and locked in the senate chamber. That never happened. What else, do you wonder, wasn’t going on? Senator Dmitry Trubachencov did not lead a salute to SOS Nathan Murphy, a.k.a. the religion overlord, after stating Murphy’s atheist-abolishing bill was reflective of Nazi Germany or Communist Russia. Senators were not renamed to the likes of ‘Senator Punk’ or ‘Senator Chimichanga.’ Senator Damon Eastman was not ostracized by signs posted from the governor’s office saying “EASTMEN IS SPELLED EASTMON.” And overall, the senate never wrongfully immersed into heated debates before discussion was called. Ok, wait. That last one totally happened on a few bills, especially the ones on civil unions. President of the Senate Bert Martin had his hands full.
Other happenings include the passage of a few notable bills: bills to abolish the death penalty (SB #128/129), ‘An Act to Incentivize the Production of Cannabis Hemp for Alternative Energy’ (SB #133), ‘An Act to Ban all Hannah Montana Merchandise from Montana’s Stores’ (SB #153), ‘An Act to Decriminalize Marijuana in Order to Reduce Over-Crowding in Montana Prisons’ (SB #130), and bills to allow civil unions (SB #143/151). The civil union bills gave way to so much debate that the bills were tabled and reevaluated in a special committee. SB # 143/151 passed the senate by only a few votes.