Robin Hood

By: Emmett Wester
Last week as I walking home from school, I had an epiphany. I realized that in order to fully express and support my beliefs (paper hats should be worn whenever possible), I would have to start a lobbyist coalition based around a “Robin Hoodian” code of ethics.
Coalition name:
R idiculously
O btrusive
B rilliantly
I ndustrialized
N erdy

H ats
O f
O blivious
D estruction

Being the genius that I am, I realized that large paper hats would most emphasize the ideas behind the coalition, so I quickly created five paper hats. (Sporting green or camouflage tights while wielding a bow was also considered, but hats are slightly easier to make out of paper) Two very large ones, to be worn by the coalition leaders (Mathias Fochs and Myself), and three smaller ones, to be worn by a select few members of the coalition who truly appreciate the thoughts behind the whole matter. Unfortunately, one of the larger hats was locked in the lobbyist room.
Next year I plan to create a party based around the Robin Hoodian code of ethics. To join, you must wear a paper hat whenever possible. Ridiculous sunglasses are also suggested, but not required.